January 2012
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remember the janky shower?
guess what? it’s still janky! in fact the hot water dial has been totally stripped. we tried calling the handyman who came over and fixed it when we couldn’t get it to turn off the day after he had back surgery, but this time he didn’t answer.
internet, i hate to tell you this but i stink. i need to go out and apply for jobs but i can’t do it being a smelly, dirty...
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“Let’s borrow life preservers and jump over. I think we should do something...”
– F. Scott Fitzgerald, ‘Tender is the Night.’
(via nogreatillusion)
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good form/bad form: the i've almost lived in...
GOOD FORMS
- found a pizza place on ballard that has amazing happy hour deals including a slice of your choice and an olympia for four dollars and fifty cents. after nine pitchers of olympia are five dollars. yes i know, olympia is gross, but PIZZA AND BEER. AND IT’S CHEAP
- i get to see my bestie shelbe at least once a week which is much better than maybe five days out of the year. plus...
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who knew what a little cleaning could do
i bought these boots in this condition.
my friend mallory called them dirty, hipster boots. i moved in with my boyfriend who i thought understood my affinity for cowboy boots, but i guess he didn’t understand how strong it was. he is very concerned about the amount of shoes i have. i was very concerned about the amount of cds he had. yesterday he got rid of probably half them and...
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“I Kissed a Girl” was just straight-up offensive. The whole [song] is like,...”
– Kathleen Hanna
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“No matter where I go, I still end up me. What’s missing never changes. The...”
– Haruki Murakami, South of the Border, West of the Sun (via transatlantique)
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snowstorm of epic proportions tomorrow in my new... →
i don’t know much about my new home but i do know that seattleites are miserable snow drivers. if there is twelve inches, that’d be amazing, but even six will keep most city dwellers shut up. tomorrow is a great day to put on your snow boots and take back the streets! my plans include getting bundled up and marching down to the video store to rent the second season of the walking dead...
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“Welcome aboard, Mr. Pilgrim,” said the loudspeaker. “Any...”
– Slaughterhouse Five, Kurt Vonnegut
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just finished watching forks over knives
and now i feel guilty for my candy heart eating… tomorrow i’m going to buy some quinoa, some kale, and some yams and pretend to be healthy. the checkout person will think i’m a vegan and that i’m skinny and that i write my local congressman about not granting farm subsidies to factory farms producing meat/corn/soy.
i may also have to buy another bag of candy hearts…...
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how i will make my first grand
the setting... i'm riding my bicycle through my new city with a helmet on following all the laws and being cautious. a lexus with a pampered housewife hits me making a right turn and chatting on her bluetooth. it's just another gray day in seattle (which just fyi i'm totally loving and finding them good for depression). i bounce off my bike, lay on the ground for a second, make sure my fingers work, check out my bike and begin to stand. the pampered housewife flys out of her car, arms waving above her head and kitten heels clacking on the street
pampered housewife: oh my god did i hit you? i did didn't i, i hit you. oh god.
me: well, yeah you did just hit me but you know, i-
pampered housewife: oh i can't believe it, are you okay? are any bones broken? and your bike!
me: look lady, i just got scratched up and my bike is already a bit of a clunker anyway, i gotta get to work.
pampered housewife: my insurance cannot find out about this. my husband will kill me. he probably will make me drive the civic that shuts off to be gas efficient. oh god, how embarrassing! listen, please don't tell. here just take this
the pampered housewife reaches into her glove box and hands me ten $100 bills.
me: oh no, you know that's really not necessary... you know, these things happen
pampered housewife: oh no, you must. i'm sorry, and i really can't have anyone find out about this. just take the money, please?
me: well lady, if you insist.
she gets in her car and i ride off in the sunset off to some of the fancy ballard ave. stores to buy myself a new coat.
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current crushes
SCOTT AVETT
do you see this picture? a man of baseball casual button up shirts scruff and KITTENS? my crush is back on and full fledged folks.
MICHELLE WILLIAMS
she has phenomenal style, the most perfect nose and a skin complexion rivaling that of an angels. not to mention she got paid to make out with ryan gosling and got to have heath ledger’s baby.
CHRISTIAN BALES BEARD
...
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perfection
burritos, deschutes brew, and the avett brothers live volume three in my mostly decorated seattle apartment.
the world is good.
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